The National Advocate for People with Down Syndrome Since 1979

National Down Syndrome Society
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If They Had A Voice
If They Had A Voice
If They Had A Voice
If They Had A Voice

The day Marley was born, I went straight to the nursery and held her for well over two hours. I just held her and cried because I had never experienced such a love for anyone or anything in my life. I think the Thai nurses thought I was crazy because eventually they told me I needed to go be with my wife. Three days later, before we left the hospital, the pediatrician told us she thought Marley might have Down syndrome. My reaction: Are you kidding me? I immediately had a panic attack and they took me down to the ER. Thoughts were racing through my mind: How could my perfect daughter have Down syndrome? How could they not know for sure? How could the general ultrasound- that said we had a one in 18,000 chance of having a child with Down syndrome be wrong? Why was God punishing me? How could I live with a daughter that was going to be rejected by everyone… including myself? I entered into a deep depression for the first year of Marley’s life. My wife was so concerned about me that I started taking anti-depressants and seeing a counselor. I contemplated leaving my wife, or giving my daughter up for adoption, or suicide. I would lie awake at night thinking about my future, and searching for a reason to live. I believed everything negative the world told me about Down syndrome, and viewed it as a curse on my family. The entire time I worried about how this would change my life! That is when I realized that my relationship with God was not where it needed to be, despite the fact that I had gone to a Christian University, been ordained in a Christian Church, and moved overseas to teach at a Christian school. Years ago, before my father died or Marley was born, my father told me, “If you wanted to fix a problem, then do something about it.” That is what I did. First I started reading through Psalms to find comfort in the Scriptures. Next I started researching and calling every family I could find that had a child with Down syndrome. I owe a great deal to these families because they were willing to talk to me despite the 12-hour time difference between Bangkok and the US. I also started forcing myself to interact with my daughter. She was desperate for me to start loving her, and continued loving me until I broke down and did the same. And finally, I talked to God. I talked to Him just like He was sitting in a chair beside me. I was open and honest about the entire process, and then I began finding peace. Healing is a process, a journey, and that is what prompted me to make a video. I would have never experienced this life changing transformation if Marley had not been born. It is true, there are difficult times having a daughter with Down syndrome. But it also true, that she is very much like any other child. Marley smiles, laughs, plays, is able to meet many developmental milestones (albeit her own pace, with her own style), makes mistakes and most importantly - completes our family. She literally brightens my day every time I see her.




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Naomi Carroll. McMlellan, United States, NC
8/14/2014 7:33:54 PM
She us a cousin of mine and I told her parents that choice them to bw her parents because HE know they could handle it.

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